Have you been experiencing the overwhelming feeling that the end is near? We’re right there with you. Climate change is killing polar bears, 2020 was probably the worst year in human history, and things haven’t gotten much better in 2021. At this point, I’m half-expecting the earth to open up into a full-on apocalypse. I’m talking zombies, meteors, hellfire, and superviruses… oh wait, we already got one of those…
But never fear, Ideal fam, because we’re here to tell you about some badass vehicles that are perfect for riding out the apocalypse! One of them will take you from land to sea and safely away from those zombie scum, and another one can protect you against drone strikes! If you want to have a chance at surviving the end of days, listen up! These are the best vehicles for the apocalypse…
Armored Chevy Suburban HD
If you’re looking for the perfect car to take you through the apocalypse, the classic movie car for rough and tumble situations, an armored Chevy Suburban HD, might be the perfect fit for you. I mean, this thing was even featured in The Walking Dead, so you know it’s made to roll over some zombies.
Plus, even if the world is crumbling to bits, a black Chevy Suburban with tinted windows is the last car people are going to want to mess with because they’re going to assume there’s a bunch of heavily-armed Secret Service agents inside. Hell, add antennae and some cop lights for that extra intimidation factor. Plus, if the police or the military decides to set up doomsday checkpoints, they’ll probably think you’re one of them and let you breeze right through.
Companies like Alpine Armoring will trick out your Chevy Suburban with apocalypse-ready features like multi-layered ballistic glass, reinforced door hinges, additional armoring around the fuel tank and battery, and high-grade run-flat systems. Sure, it’s going to cost you a big chunk of change, but if you’re a serious prepper, it might just be worth it.
Ariel Nomad Tactical
If you’re anticipating heavy fire from post-apocalyptic road warriors, the Ariel Nomad Tactical is not what you want to be driving in. This rig offers literally zero protection whatsoever. It doesn’t even have doors! But if your number one priority is getting the hell out of civilization as soon as possible, the Nomad Tactical will take you there.
This badass buggy was made to quickly move over the toughest terrains. It can jump up to 60 miles per hour in just 3.4 seconds and hit top speeds off 125 miles per hour with its 300-horsepower Honda K24 engine, which is just absurd for a buggy.
So, if you find yourself in a situation where the roads are backed up because everyone’s trying to get out of the city before the impending nuke hits, hop in that Nomad Tactical and ship off to the wilderness. This buggy will have you safely out of the blast radius in no time!
Mercedes-Benz Unimog
Need a vehicle that’s going to safely transport your friends and family, and can hold off the hordes of brain-hungry zombies at the same time? Say hello to the Mercedes-Benz Unimog. Nothing short of a predator missile is stopping this thing.
The Unimog is an armored-up monster with a panoramic cab in case you’ve got to pump lead into some zombie scum while you’re driving. It’s also got an interior ventilation system, hydraulics, an on-board tire inflation system to adjust to different terrains, and eight forward and six reverse gears. There isn’t a landscape on Earth that the Unimog can’t conquer!
However, you’re going to have some trouble getting the Unimog over 100 miles per hour, and it’s 0-60 time isn’t very impressive. So, if the War Boys from Mad Max are trying to pole-vault onto the back of your truck, you might be screwed. But if you’re dealing with slow-moving members of the undead, they won’t stand a chance against the Unimog.
Delta4x4 VW T6
2020, potentially the worst year in the history of time, has a lot of people preparing for a doomsday scenario. Luckily, the talented tuners over at Delta4x4 are taking these concerns seriously. They’re taking Volkswagen T6 and T6.1 vans and converting them into apocalypse-ready rolling bunkers.
Since you’re probably going to die in an apocalypse anyway, you probably want to ride out your last days in comfort. That’s why Volkswagen’s offering a new T6.1 California trim that features a pop-up roof and a bunch of internal features to keep you comfortable while the world goes to sh*t around you.
And if you call up Delta4x4, they’re gonna hook you up with even more sweet features to turn your comfy campervan into a blast-resistant beast. Sheet metal armor over your engine, transmission, differential, and fuel tank. Not to mention a Seikel suspension lift kit with adjusted Bilstein shocks. Oh yeah, and they’ll even slap a bull bar on the front so you can plow through a roadblock or a mob of zombies.
Caterham Brutus 750 Motorcycle
So let’s say a crater opens up in the middle of Earth, like that one that just came out of nowhere in Siberia, for instance. And you’re driving straight for it and your only option is to try and make the jump. You really think you’re going to clear that gap in your mom’s Volvo V60? You probably wouldn’t even make it in a Dodge Viper! What you need is the Caterham Brutus 750 Motorcycle.
This 750cc beast is ready to swerve through hordes of infected zombies with its super lightweight body, and it can adapt to any terrain your apocalypse adventure might take you on. It comes with Maxxis tires that are equally suitable for the street and off-road, and if you own a wrench, you can even convert the Brutus into a snowmobile!
You never know where you’ll need to go to avoid doomsday, but the Brutus will make sure you get there, over gravel or snow, and get there quickly.
Quadski Amphibious ATV
Unless every zombie movie I’ve ever seen has been lying to me, I’m pretty sure that zombies can’t swim. So, the Quadski Amphibious ATV could be your ticket to safety if you find yourself being chased by members of the undead. The Quadski is exactly what it sounds like: a quad and a jetski all rolled into one. That means you can rip this thing across land into the forest and head straight for the nearest river.
It’s got a BMW 4-banger that lets you do 45 miles per hour on both land and water. Good luck trying to catch me while I’m ripping 45 down the river straight for the Pacific Ocean. And to make that switch from land-traveling ATV to full-on jetski takes just 4 seconds!
These amphibians start at around $40,000, which is crazy expensive for an ATV, or a jetski, for that matter. But can you REALLY put a price on preparedness?
BMW X5 Protection VR6
As part of a special sale, probably geared toward special agents or anyone predicting an upcoming apocalypse, BMW released a series of protection vehicles, one of which is the BMW X5 Protection VR6. This car will get you and your family to your next safehouse even if you run into a group of mole people wielding turret guns.
The underbody, cargo area, firewall, and door jams are all wrapped in super-strong armor that can handle an astounding amount of explosive impact. And the windows, built by Post Blast Protective Technologies, will eat up all the bullets in your clip without shattering completely.
But what if you get attacked by a drone strike sent by a hostile foreign power? No worries, the optional reinforced roof will take care of that real quick. And speaking of quick, the Protection VR6 is hiding a 523-horsepower 4.4-liter twin-turbo V8 under the hood that’ll get you the f**k outta Dodge.
EarthRoamer XV HD
The EarthRoamer XV HD is so comfortable, you’ll feel right at home, even if the Earth is burning to ashes all around you. This isn’t an overlanding vehicle for a short trip, you could ride out the rest of your life in this thing and be perfectly happy.
With interior space and design that’s pretty much unparalleled by other overland vehicles, fuel and water tanks the size of swimming pools, a Heavy Duty Ford F-750 4-wheel-drive chassis, and hydraulic leveling system, the EarthRoamer XV HD is ready to take off into the mountains, and do so in style and comfort.
Who said there’s an apocalypse? You’re kicking back in your XV HD’s spacious living room.
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